Eating disorder

Yes, I think I have an eating disorder, even I thought that it'll never happen to me.
I always was like: "Oh my god, I would never stop eating, it's such a bullshit, you know. I'd rather be fat.". Well and without noticing it, I almost stopped eating. It started like that I wasn't hungry and if I was, I didn't want to eat, because it just disgusted me. Because everytime I eat something, I feel sick.

I know that I'm not that fat. And I don't know why is this happening. I'd like to eat, but I can't, you know? I eat once a day and if something good won't happen, I think my body will be soon without energy to do anything. I've got something fixed in my brain probably. Since those days people called me fat-ass, even people I thought they like me. And maybe after so many years of listening, something in my did "click" and my body changed in this way.

I don't know what to do, I think that when finally I have no problems with other people, I've got problems with me. With my health, with my personality.

What else to say, it sucks guys and I would never ever wish those things what are happening to me to my worst enemy.